Smiling is my favorite =)

So, William and Mary is my ideal school. My number one actually. And I just finished up the application. It had a supplement that asked, what is unique about you and makes you so colorful? They wanted it written in a 'blog-type' entry as in an 'about me' section on myspace or facebook. And of course they didn't want you to just brag about your self. They had a cute little you-tube video explaining all about it, and how those who review your applications don't look like John Adams or George Washington, but rather moms and teachers. So, this is what I wrote as my about me section:
I live every day to the fullest- taking nothing for granted. I don’t get caught up in the repetition and schedule of my boring day to day scene, but rather prefer to ‘stop and smell the roses.’ Actually, I prefer to stop and smell fresh cookies or a summer night, but that’s just me. I find inspiration in the simplest things- a good jog, a lazy beach day, my family and I could go on forever... But for the concern of other’s sanity, I will stop. For some reason I catch myself laughing when I shouldn’t be- out of embarrassment, pain or simply because I just can’t contain myself. I love to snowboard, travel to various countries, sew my own designs, and spend time with the people that matter the most to me. My friends make fun of me due to the fact that I watch the local math channel for my own pleasure and constantly sing at the top up my lungs, even though I have a terrible singing voice. (My mom, however, tells me otherwise, but I guess that’s what she is here for). I have a big family (and a twin bother that is my best friend!) and was brought up to be very loud and sarcastic. Although, I must admit, I do know when to be serious (again, my mom would beg to disagree). I can’t wait to grow up and make my dreams come true, because I want to have it all. I will one day be a ‘Doctor without Borders’ and hopefully travel to third world countries and help underprivileged people, with my ‘healing touch’. I hope to help as many people as I can through volunteer, an occupation in the medical field, and delivering the best medicine in the world- laughter.

Dreaming.

I was listening to my favorite band (well, one of them...) Ingram Hill. And they have a kinda-semi-new CD out called Cold In California. But seriously, I reccomend that everyone at least checks it out. What can it hurt? Anyway, they have this one song called Impossible and my favorite lyrics are, Everybody has to have some kind of thing... An impossible dream. And I love it because I have so many impossible dreams. Although they might seem impossible to everyone (mostly, my mom) and even myself at times, I know that one day I will accomplish what I want. I get so antsy thinking about what I have to do to get me to that point, but it will all be so worth it in the end. And I can not wait. I love to dream. If there was a job where you just get to dream all day, I would want to be it. I love thinking about the future and having a real job and traveling and falling in love (and all that sappy love stuff)- all total cliches, but I just can't help myself. I really want to fall in love so bad. But, I am so afraid. I've seen the best and worst of love. And it scares me. But that is not shocking, because I am afraid of so many things. Not a lot of people know that I am afraid of so much. I get anxiety and I actually started biting my nails when I was younger from it. I also twirl my hair when I get anxious (or bored, tired or mad). But, whatever. It's actually gotten a lot better than from when a was a wee little one. I was impressed with myself for having progressed. Haha. I am so tired and have to much to do. Like play with my puppy, homework, college stuff, and play with my puppy some more.

40 Things...

I'm making a list of forty things that has happened to me in the past month... whether it's infuriating, embarrassing, funny, whatever. Here it goes: 1. Got really sick from eating egg salad at the hospital when volunteering. 2. Made plans to go to New Hampshire. 3. Read a story to my nephew. 4. Went shopping with my brother’s girlfriend. 5. Went shopping with my mom. 6. Gave blood. 7. Laughed so hard I couldn’t breathe. 8. Went to my brother’s hockey game. 9. Took Zumba classes at the gym, and pretended I could dance. 10. Applied to colleges. 11. Got mistaken for my brother- and got in trouble for skipping my art class (that I don’t have.) 11. Worked on calculus homework for 5 hours with my friends Kelli and Jared. 12. Have yet to complete a full week of school (which is no surprise… cause I hate school.) 13. Went back to my elementary school to help tutor Spanish speaking kids. 14. Inducted new members into the National Honor Society. 15. Slept all day. 16. And then slept some more. 17. Procrastinated. 18. Applied to colleges. 19. Got accepted to Stockton (as my fallback). 20. Got a scholarship... the Dean's Scholarship? 21. Took the SATs. 22. Tried to convince my mom to let me get a tattoo. 23. Went shopping with my friend Kelli and her sister. 24. Went to Atlantic City with my best friend. 24. Got Christmas presents for my family. 25. Babysat my niece Abby, and got frustrated after she cried for 47 minutes. 26. Got pants pulled down while setting the dinner table. 27. Ate waffles for dinner. 28. Sewed a pair of pants to be 'skinny jeans'. 29. Re-arranged my room. 30. Got in trouble at work for something I didn't do. 31. Forgot to put my availability at work, so got zero hours. 32. Bought a bathing suit, heeeelllooo Caribbean. 33. Did calculus extra credit. 34. Measured the calc extra credit box wrong. 35. Left school crying. 36. Failed a test (for the second time in my whole life). 37. Thought long and hard about life. 38. Begged my mom to let me drive to New Hampshire. 39. Got a puppy- Lola! 40. Wrote 40 things I did in the month of December!

Movie Post!

One of my favorite movies is the 80’s classic Pretty In Pink starring Molly Ringwald. Ringwald’s character, Andie Walsh, is a poorer, less cool, but fashion obsessed teenager in High School. To be able to afford her thrift store attires and self made styles she works at a local music store with one of her good friends. The ‘cool’ kid from school comes to buy music, and Andie starts to like him. My favorite character is the protagonist Andie, because despite her unemployed, single father lacking money she is able to live her life like a normal teenager and not let her peers opinions affect her. I like her for being unique and being herself, and for the way she fell for the popular guy at school even though she knew he would get ridiculed. The plot is not like your average poor girl falls in love with rich guy cliché. It involves heartbreak and heartache before love. Pretty in Pink makes you laugh and want to cry along with Andie in her crazy hectic life. It reminds me of some of my friends, because a lot of my friends don’t care what the popular people think and continue to be themselves. They know that they will get talked about and made fun of, but they ignore it and carry on. I have seen this movie a lot of times, because it just sends a good message to be you and love it. It makes you want to not change for anyone, because you get more from that than changing to be your peers… Andie was herself and still got the guy. My best friend loves the movie as much as I do, but most others think it’s boring. I would recommend it to friends and strangers because it is a classic 80’s movie with a good plot and message. Enjoy!

Blogger's block...

So, I don't ever know what to blog about. I don't really have much of an imagination nor an exciting life... Which makes blogging a lot more difficult than it really is. Because I feel like certain 'blogs' kind of make you come across as a certain type of person person. If you were to blog about your accomplishments you're conceited and well, cocky; writing about your problems only makes you whiny and annoying; and talking about typical stuff (weather, school, sports...) is just boring. I have been completely slacking on blogging simply because I don't know what to blog about. I suppose I could write about my aspirations and dreams, but I already did blogs similar to that. And it seems that when I come up with a blog I can't wait to write up (or type, really) I forget it or realize it sounded so much better in my head. I guess I'll just have to ponder some more.... But, whatever I come up with will make an excellent post next time!

Live, Laugh, Love.

There are just some things in life that make me smile even when it seems impossible to grin and bear it. But my family is one of the few things that I love with all my heart, mostly because they've always been there for me. They support me in most decisions I make and I wouldn't want it any other way. They are just as obnoxous, loud, quirky and silly as I am. My family has gone through a lot together, but its made us closer and more loving in the end.

"What you feel is what you are, and what you are is beautiful"

-Goo Goo Dolls

"Well, I'm what I am and I'm what I'm not

And I'm sure happy with what I've got

I live to love and laugh a lot

And that's all I need..."

-Kenny Chesney

The beach =)

There is something about the beach that just calms me down. Takes my worries and crushes them with the flow of the tide. Make my heart, mind and soul light again. Whether it is the middle of summer and the sun is shining or the end of November and the sun is just begining to rise. I love to feel the sand beneath my feet, hear the waves crashing the shore, feel the mist on my face, and often the warmth of the sun. It's just relaxing. It gives me inspiration and makes me wonder. I think the best when I'm at the beach. It's just my idea of a perfect place. Here are some of my favorite quotes about the beach and what not:
“The cure for anything is salt water - sweat, tears, or the sea.” -Isak Dinesen
“My life is like a stroll on the beach...as near to the edge as I can go.” -Thoreau
“Our memories of the ocean will linger on, long after our footprints in the sand are gone.” -Anonymous
“We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean. But the ocean would be less because of that missing drop.” -Mother Teresa
“At the beach, life is different. A day moves not from hour to hour but leaps from mood to moment. We go with the currents, plan around the tides, follow the sun. We measure happiness by nothing we can hold... nothing we can catch. Everywhere…Life is jumping and elusive and momentously momentary. We want to [stretch] the days, distill the memories, make them last. At the same time, we know that the beauty is in the evanescence. Every wave comes in, then retreats. Every day promises, then turns its back and slips away. Every joy has a little tease in it, a give and a take, and leaves a wake of longing." Sandy Gingras

Relaxed!

So, to make a long story short my family has gone to New Hampshire a few times without me. It is due in large part to the fact that I have no time for myself, so there was no way I could drive for 12 hours and not get much accomplished in my valuable days. Haha. But, yes. I finally relaxed this weekend. I drove up to New Hampshire on Wednesday after school and got there around 8-ish. It was just my sister and I going to visit our Uncle, Aunt, and cousins. I had such a good time. I almost forgot what it was like to just sit around. We hung out with my cousin's friends (who are all my age), road quads, ice skated, played spoons, and just a lot of fun things. The ride was a bit brutal, but worth it. I got to sleep in and just completely relax (especially cause my phone broke!). They live like 35 minutes from any store, so it was like a slice of a different lifestyle. A very plain and simple one. And I loved every minute of it. I can't wait to go back again =) And my family is coming down for Thanksgiving! I am so excited!

Sound Story

“No, no. You really don’t have to. You, don’t have to go. It was just a joke. We were only kidding,” I shouted through the crisp air of the night.
“It was your idea. And I ain’t backing out now, that’s for sure!” Benji replied.
I could hear the rest of our friends scampering around the room, shouting. Neither they nor I could believe Benji was actually going over there. I looked back up at Benji’s bedroom window, and made a noise so they knew we were ready. They pressed their faces so hard against the glass that red circles began to appear on their noses, and fog began to appear.
I threw his body against the fence and sucked in, hoping that if my best friend was caught, I wouldn’t be seen. I could see Benji squinting his eyes and really trying to concentrate. He couldn’t really see all that well, but I’m he could see the figures and shadows of what laid in the room on the other side of the window. He held his breath, closed his eyes, and began knocking furiously on the pane. He must have thought that I left him, cause he kept looking back repeatedly. Again, he focused on what was inside.
“I think there’s a ghost,” he shouted.
“No way. There can’t be… Just go for it again,” I heard myself whisper. What was I thinking? Did I really just tell him to do it again? A knot began to grow in my stomach. Benji closed his eyes again, took a deep breath and began to raise his arm.
All of a sudden, alarms started going off. Or maybe they weren’t alarms. I listened in again. It sounded like a bunch of clocks, coo-coo clocks to be exact. Benji jumped out of fear, and his hand thrust through the glass. We rushed around my fence, through the back door, and up the stairs to my bedroom. Our hearts were racing. They were racing so fast that we could barely breathe.
“What happened? What was that crash?” our friends questioned as they lay on the floor, hoping no one saw them peeking through the window.
“Well, there were cats. Lots of them. And a bunch of old people things. Everything looked like it was covered in dust. At least I think it was dust. And I saw a bunch of clocks. All against one wall,” Benji tried to explain.
My mom barged in my room, “What was that? Did you hear that ruckus? What were you all doing?”
“Mom, I can explain. We were playing truth or dare... And well, it was my turn. I chose dare. And they wanted me to knock on old Mrs. Smithson’s window. So I did. But my fist…”
The doorbell rang. We all looked around the room. My mom sighed and walked down the stairs. She opened the door. I peeked my head around the corner of the top of the stairs. I couldn’t believe what I saw. It was old Mrs. Smithson standing at my doorstep.

I have no time!

Ah, so I'm gonna have to vent again. I was up last night- all night doing homework. But, it's okay. I'm not looking forward to this week. At all. I have work on Tuesday, Wednesay, Friday (catering a wedding!), Saturday, and Sunday. I mean I love to work. But, I would love to have a life too. I usually work like a 4 day week, on top of school, but 5 is going to drive me into the ground. Altough it is nothing like how much I worked this summer. Uh, I am going to get no sleep what-so-ever. So, that is why I am going to sleep now. To make up for the lack of it the rest of my week. Haha. Goodnight!

Things to do!

So, in the begining of the year I wrote in my Journal a list of things to do before I die. It was due largely in part to the fact that I read an article in a magazine about a girl in her 20's who was diagnosed with cancer. She lived out loud and thought her family and friends how to live and love with no regrets. It was truly inspiring. She was able to accomplish more than half of the things she had written on her list of things to do; that she kept in her wallet. So, I made my own. Some I have accomplished, and I'm sure I will add to the list as I get older and see more of life. But here it is:
1. Sing…sing out loud
2. Visit Europe (mostly Ireland, Scotland, and Italy)
3. Become a pediatrician, with lots of degrees
4. Have my own practice OR become a doctor with no borders
5. Help kids in Africa and other 3rd world countries
6. Get my two tattoos
7. Learn guitar
8. Snowboard in Canada, eh?
9. Surf more… my board is getting lonely
10. Become more like my mom
11. Skydive
12. Climb a mountain
13. Parasail
14. Fall in love <33
15. Inspire a dream
16. Give back to those who gave to me
17. Pay it forward too
18. Make my own clothes
19. Travel cross country
20. Start some sort of an organization
21. Make jewelry- and lots of it
22. Run a full and half marathon; 5ks get so boring
23. Paint what I consider to be a masterpiece
24. Write a book
25. Make lots of friends
26. Have a family
27. Love myself
28. Forgive
29. Get my jeep!
30. Help a teen through a rough time
31. Complete a 3 day breast cancer walk with the women I love
32. Road trip with my best friends
33. Stop and smell the roses
34. Fight oppressions
35. Be Alive, really alive.

Normalcy?

So, I think that the whole normal thing is overrated. From senior superlatives to the homecoming court... Why such cliche people all the time? I predicted the exact people for everything. What ever happened to rooting for the underdog? Because rooting for the underdog gives me greater satisfaction. If they win, kudos to them. If not, good for them for at least trying and having been the underdog. But seriously, when I heard the names being read aloud for all such nominations I couldn't stop myself from groaning to my best freind seated beside me. It was everyone we thought it would be. They are all the same... How boring? Wait. Let me excuse myself. Cause if you were to ask them, they are all so unique with their senses of fashion and hairstyles and views/beliefs on the world today. I don't think they've yet to realize that even their 'unique' characteristics are still carbon copies of the person sitting to the right of them. Or at least the same as all 1183 of their 'friends'. And it doesn't get me upset or angry, it just makes me wonder... Why? Why them? What makes them so cool? But, I guess I can't really complain cause I love just being myself. Silly, sarcastic, loud, obnixous, determined, me. As once said by the brillaint Dr. Suess "Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is youer than you."

Busy. Busy.

Ah, this weekend was so crazy. I had literally 5 hours of sleep. The entire weekend. (Well, maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration.) Friday I had to help with the teacher BBQ... set up, prepare the food, and serve the food. Weird seeing teachers just hanging out with each other. But, after that I went to the mall cause my best friend had yet to get her dress for Saturday night. Talk about procrastination. But, we did that and had a good time. Then it was time for the last home football game =( And I didn't get home till late cause we went out to eat afterwards. Aparently so did everyone else, cause I saw everyone I've ever known. Then Sunday I had a meeting for work at 9:30, but I like to do small gestures of kindness, so I left 15 minutes earlier than I had to and got doughtnuts for the crew. They appreciated it. And right after the meeting I worked till 4-ish. Then I was on my was home to get ready for the dance. I got ready in record time and was on my way to pictures. Then was the dance till 10:30 and an after get-together at a resturaunt. And after that I went to a friends house till 2 in the morning and my best friend and I walked home. It was so coooold. But I was up at 6 again to go do a Breast Cancer Walk. And by the time I got home I felt so sick and tired. I crashed and slept all night. And didn't feel so good on Monday either. Thankfully the weekend is over!

Weekend!

This past 5 day weekend I went to go visit a bunch of colleges. Perhaps I should clarify that a bunch is infact, 6 colleges. I was in the Virginia/Maryland/D.C. area. And I loved it. My top choices are William and Mary, Loyola, Johns Hopkins, and American. The other ones that really just weren't for me included Georgetown and Mary Washington. So, majority of the time I was in the car driving and the other majority I spent at informational sessions. But, it was worth it. I find it so overwhelming that where ever I decide to go/get accepted to is a decision that will affect the rest of my life. It's actually scary... I am going into the bio/pre-med feild, so I can eventually be a doctor. I plan on becoming a part of the 'Doctor's With No Borders' program. So I will be able to help out children and those who need medical care in underdeveloped and 3rd world countries. This Febuary I might go to Cambodia to build an orphanage and mentour needy children. It's costly, so I have to start fundraising reeeeaaal soon. But, since I'm not yet 18 my mom has to go with me... Oh wait, she has no desire whatsoever to go. I am convinced that I can convince her. I will make it happen. I'm supposed to have been finishing up a few minutes ago, so I'll probably head out now... Even though my hand were just getting warm from it being so cold in the media lab.

First Blog... ever.

So, I'm really not sure what exactly to write. I've never blogged before. But I'm here and I'm here to stay... for the year at least. I kinda think the whole concept of everyone being able to read this is a bit baffling. I'm excited though. It should be fun =) I can't wait to fill everyone in on my own writings. And get some ideas from everyone else too!